The Date (Old RP - 2007)

The Date
Old Roleplay from 2007


(MAD Agent Dick played by Guy Sherridan (Mr Bedlam), Inspector Prince played by me (Axel Alloy) and Ted Shackleford (The Man in the Yellow Hat) played by Pirka)


Dick was nervous. He had a date with Prince and he wasn't sure where he should take her. After all, such a fine lady should be treated to the finest dining and only the best surroundings in the city. It was just a pity Dick was down to his last thirty dollars. He squinted at his wallet and with a resentful sigh, he rammed it into his trouser pocket.

"Some gentleman YOU are Dick", he mumbled while thinking about how he couldn't afford to buy her dinner AND get her a rose to meet her with.

He stood up from his slouching position on the bed and lurched his way to his mirror. Hair combed and gelled, clean shaven, smelling of jasmine and sandalwood, sharp back suit with an out of place yellow tie. Dick fiddled with it a while, muttering under his breath about how it was his only one and that he hated yellow. After much struggling, he turned on his heels, grabbed his keys and was off out of his door.

"She doesn't deserve me..."

Prince was in her hotel room trying to come to terms with her sudden change in height. She wasn't used to wearing heels. In fact she wasn't really used to dressing up in general.

"I am NOT wearing make up", she grumbled while trying her hardest not to trip over the hem of her black dress, "I think it'll be bad enough having to wear all this!"

She fiddled with a jade bracelet on her wrist and sighed.

"I hope Dick appreciates all this!"

Switching off the TV, she exited her hotel room and battled with her dress and heels all the way down to the hotel lobby.

"Ugh... So... Stupid."

She felt a little better when the door man gave a her a compliment.

Dick shivered as a gust of wind howled between the buildings. He was waiting at the fountain for Prince to arrive, as it was where they had agreed to meet. It was just a pity that the gust of wind blew some of the water onto Dicks suit.

"Oh, now thats just great", he bellowed, shaking his fist at the fountain for dousing him, "You do pick your moments!"

He and the fountain had obviously had some run-ins in the past.

"First you make me fall in you while riding my bike, then you bust and decide to work just as I'm peering down the pipe that was apparently blocked, now you do this to me! Just when I'm going on a date!" He wrinkled his nose and glared at the stone water feature with contempt. "I hate you."

With that off his chest he let out a sigh and kicked at the fountain, only to stub his toes rather badly.

"OOYAH #&%&! %#&*%$*$&#^&%!"

"Oh... Lordy", exclaimed Prince while rushing down the street with the skirt of her dress clutched tightly in her hands.

It was making a loud rustling sound as she hurried and it was getting on her nerves.

"Stupid noisy dress!"

She was getting really frustrated. Her dress was too loud, it was hard to run in heels and it really didn't help that the streets were quite crowded.

"Grr, oh EEK!"

A rather rude man was striding by and tripped her over by mistake sending her hurtling to the ground.

"Oh THAT was nice of you. Thank you very much", she yelled as she shot up and confronted the lout, "Don't you worry about me! Nooo. You just barge by!"

The yob stared at her with a frown as she virtually spat her words at him.

"People like you have no respect for anyone! You think you are gods gift to the world, but you're NOT! Y'hear!? HMM?"

The rude man blinked at her and pointed at her foot. "Yer missin ya shoe."

Prince was too busy trying to give him an earfull and took a few seconds to realize what the man had said.

"Oh what!?" She twisted and turned to try and find her shoe, only to see it lying in the gutter all dirty and scratched.

"Oh, thats just peachy", she mumbled as she rushed to it and liberated it from its dingy resting place.

After much shoe trouble, she eventually arrived at the fountain.

Dick hadn't noticed that Prince had arrived. He was far too busy trying to beat the fountain to death. He was holding the top of the fountain in an armlock with the rest of him submerged under the water.

"Take that you fiend", he yelled triumphantly. He obvious felt slightly pleased with himself, as he started to dance and splash about.

Then he noticed Prince stood watching with her arms folded.

"Oh! Er... Hi. I didn't see you there." He hopped out the fountain with a squidge, as he had discarded his shoes when he first attacked the poor fountain and his grey socks were saturated.

"What ARE you doing", quizzed Prince, the frown growing more prominent by the second.

Dick sloshed his way towards her and blinked.

"I do hope you remember", exclaimed Prince sighing to herself over the state he was in, "That us going out on a date is only an experiment. I must say you aren't really doing much to show that you really want to make an effort."

She shook her head and eyed him from head to toe and back again.

"We can't go anywhere to eat with you looking like that. What the heck are we going to do?"

Dick looked at himself. She was right, he was in a real mess.

"Way to go, Dick", he thought as he frowned at how silly he had been, "Blow your chances!"

He hobbled his way over to where his shoes were and sat on the wall next to the fountain to put them on.

Prince was getting impatient, he could tell. Her left eye was twitching and that was usually a bad sign. He had to come up with a decent date location fast, but where would they go? Who would allow him anywhere near their place with him looking like he did?

Then it hit him.

"We could go to the arcade. You like games, right?"

Prince was taken by surprise. She never expected him to suggest that.

"Er, yes, I do like games, but... It isn't very romantic is it?"

She took one more look at the sodden Dick and sighed. She couldn't believe she was doing this and she knew that was really the only place that would let them in. Besides, they would be closing soon which meant they wouldn't be there that long and they could go for a walk in the moonlight or something afterwards.

"Ok, alright", she slapped her hand to her forehead, "Lets go there then."

She held her arm in a hook-like manner, which was another way of saying "Get your butt over here before I roundhouse you".

Dick was pleased with himself. How clever was he? He had found the perfect solution and Prince had actually agreed. She had agreed to one of HIS ideas! This was truely the best day of his life.

He stood up with his shoes firmly on his feet and limped his way over to her with a grin on his face.

Oh what a night this was going to be. Why couldn't she be with a man who treated her like royalty? She wasn't one for being selfish, nor was she materialistic, but she at least wanted to feel at least a TINY bit loved. He hadn't even bought her flowers and she felt a little bit like he wasn't really bothered. Like it was just a normal outing for him.

She didn't have time to think of anything else, because he had limped his way over to her and took her by the arm.

"Er... Why are you limping? Or dare I ask...?"

He was too happy about his situation. Not only had his idea been a good one and accepted, but he was now arm in arm with Prince. The beautiful and wonderful Prince, who was, he thought, dressed incredibly well. She looked stunning in fact. So stunning that he was lost in thought and had to be jabbed in the ribs by Prince before he could reply. He blinked, shook his head and let out a loud 'Ack' sound.

"Oh! Er, I, er. I stubbed my toe while kicking the fountain."

Prince blinked. That was the second thing that night that had taken her by surprise.

"Riiight..."

They walked down the road a bit towards the arcade. Well, Prince was walking. Dick was actually having a hard time.

"Here", Prince offered him a shoulder to lean on and she helped him all the way to the arcade.

It was almost dark by the time they arrived and the lights were all on. The neon lights of the arcade flashed on and off and it reminded Prince of a few drug raids she had been on where they had to bust into porn shops.

They entered the arcade, walked down the flight of stairs and turned the corner. The thundering noise that greeted them was quite a shock for Prince, even though she knew what the places were like for she had been in many in her lifetime.

She crinkled her nose and frowned at the loud noises. Bleeps, bloops, sounds of gun fire, screaming and roars of wild animals.

She was glad it was going to close in half an hours time. Her head couldn't take much more.

Dick couldn't wait to start playing his favorite games. He dashed over to the far end and rammed coins into the game in front of him.

"Oh yeah. I'm going to win this time", he yelled leaning forwards to get in a better position.

The game started and he chose his character. Much bleeping later, he had beaten the first 3 characters and was just about to beat the next one. If only he could remember how to do the 'Super Sexy Yoko-punch'.

Prince was still stood in the doorway trying to get her senses back when Dick had run off. She watched as he started to play a game that he was obviously addicted to.

He was shouting and yelling at his character and flailing in ways she couldn't even comprehend.

She decided she had better go in and walked over to watch Dick play. He was wiggling the joystick around and ramming the buttons as if his life depended on it.

Prince just stood there and leaned on the side of the machine feeling very out of place in her sparkly black dress.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the arcade, a certain man in a yellow hat was playing a upright racing videogame - Wacky Races, to be exact. He had chosen his character, Peter Perfect, and had gotten a steady lead at the front of the pack. He was completely absorbed by the game in front of him, his back arched within the seat and his eyes still with concentration. Just one more lap and he'd win it...

A small crowd was beginning to gather around the Wacky Races console - it was one of the most popular ones in the arcade, and always one of the most interesting to watch.
Ted didn't even see the crowd - he could only concentrate on the game.
Suddenly, Peter Perfect's car within the game crashed on the side of a wall. "GAME OVER" flashed on the screen in bright pink-and-red letters.
"Aw, noo...I almost won that one!" Ted's concentration was broken as he tasted defeat. "I was so close, too!" He fished in his pocket for more tokens as the crowd stood staring, anticipating the possibility that he would play again.

Prince was still leaning on the arcade machine that Dick was playing on. Her elbow was next to the buttons he was mashing and her head was resting on her hand.

"Oh lordy..."

Suddenly, she noticed a group of people gathered around across the way. She slowly turned her head and opened her eyes a little wider.

A crowd? Her mind whirred a little. "Hmm. Crowd... Crowds usually mean somethings happened. CROWD EQUALS EXCITEMENT!"

She stood upright and craned her neck, hoping against hope that someone had passed out and needed assistance, or that someone had been killed so she could tape the place off and interview witnesses.

"Anything is better than THIS", she thought, scowling at Dick out the corner of her eyes.

With that she wandered off leaving the unknowing Dick to his precious fighting game.

When she got to the crowd she pushed her way though and looked at what they had gathered to see. All she could see was a big seat, a yellow hat swaying to and fro and the left hand side of a screen.

"I know this game", she exclaimed, "Its my FAVORITE! OH MY GODS!" She jumped up and down with excitement over her discovery.

"Dibs on next play! Or maybe even... Two player, if anyones brave enough! Hehe." She winked at the crowd smugly.

Ted stopped fishing in his pocket for tokens and looked over his shoulder at the purple-haired woman behind him.
"Are you looking for a challenge? Because I hold a high record at this one." he smiled. A sudden wave of nervousness went over him...he wasn't even all that sure why. He waited for the woman to sit down.

"Hell yeah", shouted Prince as she ran round to the other seat.

She grabbed the hem of her big, black, sparkly dress and lifted it up with out a second thought as she straddled the big plastic seat.

"I happen to be an expert at this game, chuck."

She flicked her hair backwards and tucked it behind her ears as she grabbed at the wheel.

"Well, I also happen to be an expert." He tried not to think about his recent crash.
He hunched back in his seat again, straightened the brim of his hat, and pressed "OK." The character select screen flashed on. He turned the wheel to select Peter yet again - he had mastered (well, somewhat) his control scheme. He waited for his opponent to select her character, fidgeting in his seat with anticipation. He knew that this match would be hot...

Prince giggled to herself. She turned her wheel and chose an unusual character for her. She wasn't the type to pick this sort, but she went for Penelope Pitstop.

"Er! Er, I happen to enjoy playing as her because of how well her car steers! Thats all. I usually play as Dick Dastardly", she shouted, trying to reassure herself and to make the crowd realize she wasn't a stereotypical female gamer.

With that said, she removed her jade bracelet and placed it carefully on the front of the player two 'dashboard'.

Her eyes slowly glanced over to her opponent. "Y'ready, chuck?"

Ted smiled, a smile that shone with friendly competition. "Ready when you are!"
He pressed the "GO" button again, the screen fading out and back in as a split-screen course. A stoplight hovered in front of the two virtual racecars.
"3....2....1....AND THEY'RE OFF!" the narrator's voice started the race. Ted, in the form of the Turbo Terriffic*, zoomed quickly into an early lead. He hunched further forward into his seat, again becoming absorbed within the virtual world of the game.


((*Peter's car.))

Prince leaned back in her seat with a serene look on her face. She prefered to keep a cool head while racing and steered using one hand. The Compact Pussycat trundled along at a steady pace behind 3 computer controlled cars.

The crowd was still intently watching the pair and Prince was feeling quite comfortable. After all, when one has made a fool of ones self on a dancing game, one tends to have no problem with an audience.

While driving steadily, she turned her head to see how her rival was coping.

"First place eh?"

Ted didn't even hear Prince's rhetorical question. He was too 'in the zone'. He was zooming along at a blinding speed and got through the first lap in less than a minute. His tongue was moving rapidly in concentration, his hands were clamped onto the wheel in such a way that they couldn't even be prized off with a crowbar.
"Ohhh...yes..." he whispered under his breath.

Prince couldn't help but laugh. He looked so funny. He reminded her in many ways of Dick... When he played games that is.

"Oh dear", she exclaimed with a sarcastic tone in her voice, "Look who is coming up behind you."

She meant herself, of course. Down went her foot, up went the gears and out came a powderpuff bomb... Followed by a little laugh from her direction.

Of course, the bomb hit perfectly. Ted didn't notice an attack was even directed at him until the red lights on his seat began to blink and a siren sounded. He started, shook his head, and then quickly snapped back into game mode. He recovered from the spin-out and sped up in a dangerously sudden manner that would most likely cause the engine on a real car to explode.
"C'mon...c'mon...YES! YESS!" His foot was locked on the gas pedal as if it were crazy-glued as he sped back into the lead.

Prince raised an eyebrow over his quick and somewhat hyperactive recovery. Since she had used her powderpuff bomb, she had two more attacks left... A 'lipstick dart' (perfect for popping things) and a 'mascara slick'.

"Nice recovery", she exclaimed while steadying herself a little. She had decided to go back to her previous driving style and was only just behind him.

Dick was still busy playing the fighting game. He had FINALLY got to the last level and was facing the boss. He knew this wasn't going to be easy and so he cracked his knuckles, rotated his neck and took firm hold of the joystick.

Punch punch, kick, punch, uppercut. SUPER SEXY YOKO-PUNCH!

"Hey WOW! Prince! I did it! I beat him! AND I DID THE YOKO-PUNCH!" He turned to face her, only to see a wall staring him in the face. "What the." He turned his head and stared at the crowd of people all cheering and yelling at something or someone. "Hmm." His mind came to the conclusion that that is where she would be, so he walked off and pushed his way through the people.

This was it. It was the last lap of the race, and Ted was certain he was going to win it. By now he was so into the game that his entire body tilted each time he turned the wheel. The crowd tilted their heads to the opposite side to see the screen. It was a rather interesting spectacle, the yellow hat flying left and right every second in a dizzying display of speed and concentration. Within the game, the Turbo Terriffic was cruising at the top of the speedometer. It looked like nothing in the universe could stop him from winning now...he was metres from the finish line.
"Almost...there...."

"Excuse me. Excuse me. 'Scuse. Thanks. Excuse!"

Hobbling along, he finally pushed through the sea of people. What was so amazing that Prince would leave him to go and spectate something else? Whatever it was, it really couldn't be as good as him winning with the 'Super Sexy Yoko-Punch'.

Then he saw the Wacky Races game with Prince in the secind player seat.

"HEY! Prince! What are you doing!? You left", he yelled really loudly.

Ted was just about to cross the finish line when...
Dick's yelling startled him, jarring him out of 'gaming mode'. "WOOOAH!" He toppled over, his hands still clamped on the steering wheel, causing his in-game character to swerve right into an in-game advertisement for a popular toilet cleanser. "GAME OVER" flashed back onto the screen. Ted rolled on the floor of the arcade, stopping right at Dick's feet. He looked up, his eyes still wide from being startled and his heart jumping around for the same reason. His hat had flown off his head and onto someone's in the crowd. There was cheering.

Prince had heard Dick's shouting and had noticed her rival fall off his seat and crash his character out of the corner of her eye. She figured she would respond AFTER she had finished her game.

So... Her foot went down and her car sailed past the finish line.

"YAAAY! I WIN", she exclaimed, her arms waving around in the air.

Dick, slightly satisfied with himself for wrecking the persons game, who, in his mind, stole his girls attention. That satisfaction, however, suddenly turned to utter shock as the person rolled over and stared up into his face.

He knew that face. Oh he knew it alright.

"WHAT THE!?"

Ted's vision cleared as he came back into the real world. He shook his head again. He looked into the crowd briefly, and noticed that a tough-looking man with sinewy arms had his yellow hat on his head. He then looked directly up.
"Whaaa?"
His eyes grew even wider when he noticed it was his older brother that he had literally bumped into. He barked a nervous laugh. "Hehe...funny seeing you here!"

Prince was still dancing around in victory, waving her left arm around in the air and her right hand holding the hem of her dress swishing it around like a can-can dancer.

She suddenly stopped and leaned forwards sprawling herself out on the two racing chairs.

"Huh? You know this yellow guy!?"

Ted turned his head to the side and directed his gaze at Prince.

"Er, yes, I do. He's my older brother. You know him?"
He then turned his head again, rather painfully, upwards to the large man with his hat. "And...uh..um...can you give me my hat back? Hehe..."

"Yes, I'm SUPPOSED... SUPPOSED to be on a date with him", hissed Prince folding her arms.

She then noticed the man in yellow talking to a rather large looking man who had his hat and so she stood up. Looking at the man in yellow, she winked. "Allow me..."

With that she turned to the oaf and batted her eyelids.

"Excuse me sir, would you kindly pass me that hat?"

The large man turned to Prince. He had dark shades on and his head was wrapped in a bandanna. He looked more like a criminal than someone who would be at an arcade...
"What do you want it for, lady? Finders keepers, losers weepers! Heh! Heh! Heh!" He laughed from his chest.

Ted turned away, an 'oh, god' look on his face.

Dick seethed a little. He wasn't sure WHAT his girlfriend was doing with his 'little brother', but he really didn't like the situation. He grabbed him by his collar and helped him to his feet rather resentfully.

"Hmph." He then watched as Prince attempted to get his meddlesome siblings hat back. Although he REALLY didn't know why she was bothering.

"Loser, eh", she grinned, "Well, how about we play a game and if I win I get the hat back and if you win you can keep it."

Her eyebrows flicked in a sneaky way. In a way, the look on her face was slightly creepy.

"Or are you scared?"

The man grinned in an evil sort of way. "You're on, lady. But let's make this more interesting." He gestured to a glowing air hockey table.

Ted smirked a little. This huge man was challenging the girl to a game of air hockey?

The man continued. The crowd hovered over the air hockey table now. "No air hockey, that's for wimps like you. Let's arm wrestle on this here table - that's more my style. Winner gets the shrimp's hat."

Ted backed away from the table slowly. But, somehow, he felt that this purple-haired woman could beat this guy. Her outwardness shocked him. He kind of liked it...

Prince's sly grin slowly started to creep its way to the very sides of her face. It looked as if, if she smiled anymore her face would fold into itself. Then her face changed. She had put on an innocent look and fluttered her eyelids again while rocking back and forth like a shy school girl. All in sarcasms sake of course.

"Oh, but Mr", she squeaked softly, "Go easy on lil ol' me. I'm only a lady."

The big man seemed to find it funny. He was sure to win. Two members of the crowd had pulled two chairs up to the table and the man sat down with his arm outstretched over it. The smirk he was wearing on his face, however, soon dropped when Prince skipped up to it all light and airy, only to pull her skirt upwards and and sit herself down in a rough manner.

She took hold of his hand and winked.

Dick hobbled his way to the table with a frown. Why was she taking the trouble to get his stupid brother his hat back? And arm wrestling!? Against THAT GUY?! She HAD to be mad!

"Er, Prince", he exclaimed leaning forwards towards her, "I, er. I don't think you should be doing that. Its only HIS hat y'know! It serves him right for losing."

Prince sighed. She couldn't be doing with him butting in. It was as if he had no faith in her whatsoever.

"Hush! Can't yo see I'm busy!?"

She averted her attention back to the big lump sat in front of her and grinned again.

"Anyway", she continued, "That HE is your brother. And I like doing good deeds from time to time. And NO, it DOESN'T serve him right, the poor guy..."

Ted smiled a nervous sort of smile. It was nervous partly because a girl in front of him was just about to arm-wrestle a lump of muscle, and partly because the same girl had defended him. He wanted to say something, but he couldn't think of anything that seemed appropriate for the awkward situation.

Prince looked over to Dick's brother and winked again.

"Y'ready toots? You're about to get your hat back."

She tightened her grip on the big man's hand.

"Countdown if you please Dick."

"Him!? Poor?! Pssh", ranted Dick, "He's no more a poor guy than my toe is Hitler!"

He tried to get her to stop, but was just met by her asking for a countdown. What should he do? He didn't want her to get hurt. And if she lost she would get laughed at, which meant HE would get laughed at and he couldn't have that, now could he?

"No", he exclaimed folding his arms once more, "If my little, puny, defenceless brother lost his hat, he should be the one to get the thing back!"

She turned around to look at Dick with a furious frown.

"Quit yer moanin' and get a'countin' before I give you another reason to go in that bloody fountain!"

Oh there was no way anyone could refuse her request now. Not with THAT sort of talk. Plus, there was the fact she really wasn't in the mood for arguing with Dick when there was a chance to arm wrestle.

"Pfft", she mumbled, "Little and puny... If he is then what are YOU stringbean!? The incredible hulk!?"

Ted smiled again, this time a little more confidently. He had a strong feeling that this amazing girl was going to win, but yet he was still feeling shy and nervous about something. He shook a little bit, but then stood up taller and straighter and attempted to cheer the girl on. "GO - uh, um, er..." He just realized he didn't even know her name yet! He put his hand back down. "Nice going," he said to himself.

Dick huffed a little over being shouted at. In front of all these tough looking, er, nerds. Ahem.

"Oh fine", he complained leaning on a near by machine. He decided to be awkward. "5, 8, 7. Go!"

She looked sharply in the direction of Dick's brother. He just attempted to cheer her on. Only thing was, Dick just gave the rather unusual countdown and she was almost severely distracted by his shouts.

"Ah, EE!"

Her attention quickly snapped back to the match.

"Mmmnnnghhh!"

The two battled to keep their arms from going to the sides, sweat slowly oozing out of their skin. Prince let out a sigh, then drew in more air.

"NAMES PRINCE", she yelled as quick as she could to the yellow guy.

Ted yelled back over the cheering. "MY NAME'S TED! TED SHACKLEFORD!" He cupped his hand to his mouth, trying to project it as far as possible over the croud's cheers and the grunts of the combatants.

Dick watched as the two duked it out. He couldn't deny it, Prince was so hot. There was something about strong women that he really liked and at that moment in time, he had never felt more attracted to anyone than he did to her. Too bad Ted shouted and broke his concentration.

"Nice... to meet you... Ted! Nghh!"

She somehow managed to push her opponents arm all the way over to her side. THUD.


The Date



The crowd errupted in cheering and the big man just sat there with tears in his eyes. Not just because he lost, but because of another reason.

"Oooh yeah", shouted Prince standing up and dancing around again, "I win."

She held out her hand.

"Hand it over, bub."

Dick was watching as Prince somehow managed to press the guys arm to the table with a thump sound. "How the heck did she pull this one off!?" His eyes darted around trying to make as much sense of the situation as possible and suddenly saw Prince's left foot. She was digging her high heel into the mans foot!

Dick felt so proud of her, but at the same time pity for considering the feelings of his brother on HIS date!

The large man sniffled like a small child, rather out of character for the bulky brute that he was. "Why'd you have to take your hand away, lady?! It was...uhhh...soft...and, uhhh, pretty..." the rather unintelligent man said, struggling for words. On the sidelines, Ted felt a sudden rush of pride at the woman, now identified as 'Prince'. She had triumphed, and Ted felt as if she was fighting it all for him, even though they had only just met. He began to cheer.

"Go Prince! Great job! Yay!"

Prince eyed the big man with a puzzled frown. "Ew."

Suddenly, she heard cheering coming from the direction of Dick's brother. She smiled at him before bowing in a highly sarcastic manner. When she lifted her head up to look at him again, she winked at him and handed him his hat.

"There you go, chuck. Good as new."

Dick peered at his brother through slitted eyes. If looks could kill, Ted would be dead twice, no, three times over by now. Sure, Prince had triumphed, but he had no right to cheer her on. After all, she was Dick's woman. If only for that night.

"Bloody test dates", he muttered to himself, as Prince winked at Ted and handed the hat over.